Canada’s Offensive Assertation

The United States was included on a Canadian list of countries whose detainees are possibly subjected to torture.  Not to worry, however, it only pertains to those who are detained illegally, so you are not in trouble as long as your Constitutional rights are upheld.

Anyway, the Canadian foreign minister has apologized for the list, and said it was part of a training class whose intent was to be provocative, not official Canadian policy.  He apologized to the U.S. and Israel, who was also on the list, saying he would never want to offend such wonderful allies such as us.  Evidently Canada is a family member whose nephews can do no wrong.

Here’s the list of countries:  The U.S. and Israel, Afghanistan, China, Iran, Mexico, Saudi Arabia, and Syria.  My first thought was:  a majority of these countries are U.S. allies.  Other than Iran and Syria we have positive relationships with all of them.  We put the Afghanistan leadership into power, if Mexico was a friend we would be enormous enablers, China is our biggest trading “partner” behind Canada and Mexico (though it’s a one-way path), and Saudi Arabia sells us oil for cheap so we completely don’t hold them to the standards of other Mideast countries (which is to say we don’t hold them to any standards at all).  And what can you say about our relationship with Israel?  If Israel told us to nuke West Philadelphia the biggest controversy would be what news channel got the exclusive rights to air its destruction.

U.S. Ambassador to Canada, David Wilkins, states:  “We find it to be offensive for us to be on the same list with countries like Iran and China. Quite frankly it’s absurd.”  Okay, the U.S. and Iran are at each other’s backs all the time.  But we are so in bed with China it’s sick.  When you are responsible for the GNP of an entire country you have to be prepared to be listed on some lists with them.  Maybe, and this is just a thought here, if you find being mentioned with a certain country’s human rights violations “offensive,” you should use whatever power you have to actually change the human rights policies of that country.  But that would mean we’d have to pay a fair price for goods purchased by Wal*Mart.  Hell, it may even make a noticeable dent in the worldwide use of child labor.  We can’t have that; we already succumbed to the evil liberals who wanted it outlawed in our own country!  What kind of capitalists would we be if we forced fair labor practices on other countries just because we have the opportunity to do so?  Thomas Jefferson would be rolling in his grave, I’ll tell you what!

Besides, the implication that we torture prisoners is obviously erroneous.  I mean, listen to what they defined as torture:  “forced nudity, isolation, sleep deprivation, and the blindfolding of prisoners.”  I find it incredibly insulting that the Canadian government would even insinuate that we conduct those practices.

Besides, it’s not like the next day Tom Ridge said waterboarding, an act the U.S. has admitted to and leaders such as George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfield said isn’t really that bad, is in fact torture.  And it’s not like the chief of our intelligence has said waterboarding would be torture if used on him, but not necessarily on other people.  I mean, how hypocritical would our government be if it was so upset that Canada would accuse us of improper interrogation techniques amid news like that?

At any rate, the ends justify the means, right?  Who would argue with that?  Other than Jesus, I mean.


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